Happy Birthday

My birthday used to be a secret. I didn't tell people when it was because I wanted them to guess, and I knew they would. In my youth, I was arrogant enough to think it would matter. Or maybe deep down I already knew it didn't, but my cynicism was still in its infancy, and the thought was a mere whisper behind one of the many closed doors inside my head.

Today, it's mostly still a whisper, but it rages into a chorus from time to time. The closed door has multiplied, hinges rattling from the harsh mumbles that reiterate my inconsequence.

Today, I rebel by telling everyone when I was born. "October 13," I tell everyone who will listen. "I'm a libra," I add, as if the more other people know about me, the more I exist. The more I demand to be here. I'm like a toddler stomping on one foot, insisting people remember that thirty something years ago, I changed two people's lives and I was their joy, I was wanted, I was waited for.

Today, I hold on to that. Granted, it's not too much to hold on to. I could feel my fingers clamped on the back door, pushing, pulling, wondering how many seconds the world will stop when I slip out. I am no longer in my youth, but I guess I still have the arrogance in me to think that I would matter.

The Disadvantages of Having A Male Best Friend

1. Everyone thinks you're dating. Even the people you're actually dating.
2. "You look so good together!" comments. We look good. Period.
3. When meeting potential dates, he has to just straight up pretend he's gay coz if he doesn't, they'll ask, anyway. "Oh he's straight? But you're not gettin' jiggy? You sure he's straight?" Yes, Brian. Also, you're not getting a second date.
4. You know his mom and hence have become the unwilling conveyor of mommy reminders. "Tita says you should buy clothes that aren't black. Also sleep early."
5. Random people, like let's say a Turkish kebab vendor, suddenly think they have a say in your spousal choices. "Oh, where's your wife from? You're not married? Well, you should be." Unless you're paying for the destination wedding, no thanks.
6. When you say, "We're just friends," people complete the sentence with: "...but with benefits?" Oh I wish. I wish we had benefits. And by benefits, I mean health insurance and pension.
7. When you go out and want to meet people, one has to purposely wander away to increase both of your likelihood to succeed. It sucks because you wanna spend time with your best friend AND also maybe meet the love of your life.
8. When you casually mention that you've had sleepovers at his house, everyone gives you *that* look. Like you're both 15 and have no control over hormones.
9. Even after making a list like this, you will convince absolutely no one that you're not together.

Awake

I want to be your coffee cup. To have that bottom lip running across my angles. I know how careful you can be. You take things in painfully slow, always at the precipice of hesitation. It makes my breath hitch. My senses focus on that single second the hot liquid caresses the slick skin against your teeth. My imagination mesmerizes me.

You hold that cup with such considerate gentleness that makes me curious about how you hold other things not made of porcelain. Are you as guarded? Or do those fingers explore like a conqueror, mapping out entrances and exits, twists and territories Your knuckles look rough, and my thoughts head straight to impossibilities. I want to tell you about them. But not right now, when your eyes are closed, tasting. Not right now, when I can bore right through you with unabashed hunger and still keep it a secret.

Drive

It is overwhelming, how much I want you to touch me. How much I’d like to feel your fingertips on the blade of my clothed shoulders, lightly scratching, beckoning my hairs to stand on end, soldiers at full attention. I try not to think of those same fingers roaming up and around and all the ways, but my mind is already there and every other place it could put you and your warmth. There is a tightness when I breathe, like you’ve reached inside my ribs and told my heart to stop. To slow down. To not fill my lungs with the smoky tang of your leather jacket. When I close my eyes, I am back in the semi-darkness of your car, with that song from somewhere, the dark roads opening up before us, the lights loudly blinking. But there is only you beside me and those hands on the wheel that I follow, enraptured. I wish they gripped something else. And as much as I could, I don’t look at your face. I don’t look because there is no end after that. So I subtly stare at your knee, my veins pounding on my throat, wanting to brush imaginary lint at the top of your thigh.

You make me feel like I have already touched you. It embarrasses me. I wonder if you could see right through my eyes and into the fire. There is thrumming in my skin and it hums at the undulating closeness between us. And although I have to count the days til I am back with you in the dim secrecy of those two seats, I anticipate, with parted lips, all that is possible.

Vacuum

There was a small vacuum inside my heart. Every time you told me you were tired, it turned on and sucked a little bit of joy. I felt a pinch, and I grimaced in anger and sadness. When you told me you didn't have time for me then, maybe later, it took some more. The memory of you looking at me in bed was thrown into the vast nothing of nowhere. When you forgot to tell me that you loved me, it took even more. The smell of the first bouquet you gave me. The feel of your arms that night in your car, while I whispered for you to never leave me. The taste of your lips the first time we kissed. And the pinch became a squeeze, and the squeeze morphed into a grip. I imagine my heart shriveling, getting smaller and smaller after every day I didn't see you smile at me, after every perfunctory greeting on the 17th of each month, the staccato of routine managing to get through the buzz of the fuzzy line.

After all that I am sure, right now, that my heart is a raisin. The vacuum is bigger, too. It has started to take my lungs that I can't seem to speak, more so when you ask how I am. I would have loved to say that there are times that I have to stop working just so I could stare at my phone's screen, wishing and hoping and begging for a hello. But I end up saying okay because it was all the air left in me. I feel it in my stomach, too. It grumbles even after I eat. It does not stop, and I have to type louder and louder lest my colleagues hear it. They may think it is me, complaining.

I am scared of the day, dear, that the vacuum takes everything inside me and I am left an ugly shell. I am scared of the growing black pit that creeps steadily to my throat, to my limbs. My fingers are cold. I wish they could touch you again. But you are far, and perhaps that is for the best. What I am frightened of the most is on the day I see you and reach out, the vacuum will take you, too, and I will never know where you have gone.

November Playlist: George Ezra Edition

I don’t know how he does it, but his songs are like capsules that hold my powdery memories. Every time I listen, it’s as though I’m swallowing a pill and letting my cells soak in the hazy film.

1. Budapest (“But for you I’d leave it all”)
2. Drawing Board (“Lately I’m a heartache, I’m a desperate plan in hand, I’m a blueprint in the sand”)
3. Blame It On Me (“What you waiting for?”)
4. Don’t Matter Now (“Well it won’t last and it won’t stand, It don’t matter now”)
5. Shotgun (“The sun it changed, in the atmosphere, architecture unfamiliar, I can get used to do this”)
6. All My Love (“All my love is yours, all my time is ours, all my reckless dreams and my restless hours”)

 Listen to these in order. Go on.

Baket List

Updating this list is bittersweet because I am sure I will die alone and unloved.

1. Visit all UP campuses
           UP Diliman
           UP Baguio
           UP Los Banos
           UP Cebu
2. Watch an Up Dharma Down gig live
3. Go somewhere far, alone
4. Come up to a stranger I'm attracted to and tell him/her that I find him/her attractive
5. Design (and pay for) my dream bedroom
6. Read Pride and Prejudice in one day
7. Go on a candlelit dinner date
8. Buy my parents new wedding rings
9. Save 100k
10. Find a man who will love all of me
11. Go to a gay bar.

Apparently, the straight guys that do exist and like me, don't really love me, and they leave me anyway because my all will never be enough for anyone. I don't know why I'm even trying.

A Foreign Feeling

First off, let me just say that Japan is a dream. I do not live in Tokyo with its streets bursting with people and color. I live in Okayama, where the skyline is consistently green and blue (now subtly changing to orange and gray as fall prepares to land). It has a city with lively businesses and warm restaurants. But it does not seem preoccupied with trying to become the next big capital. It goes about its own pace, trams shuttling people on a strict schedule still, but with the residents having the distinct air of living in a routine that they do not mind continuing. People are never late here, but they are never in a hurry, either. They just move on along. This is especially true in the inaka, Japan’s version of the rural, where the rice paddies meld with the smooth cemented roads and pockets of supermarkets and drugstores. I am smack dab in the middle of this geographic limbo. Work is from eight to four, but what you do after is entirely up to you, the energy you have left, and the amount of trees you are willing to drive by in order to get somewhere.

Every morning, I wake up here in a daze of disbelief. It is not the kind of disbelief where I have to slap myself to ascertain reality, not the kind of disbelief where I jump up and down my worn yellow sofa bed at the sheer blessedness of being here. It is the kind where I half-expect to hear my dorm mates’ faint snores before I open my eyes or feel the toasty heat of sunlight on my legs from the window above my bed in my parents’ house. I absentmindedly tell myself, every morning, “You are not home.” And this unintentional mantra, I suppose, has dictated what I have been and am still feeling about being in this unfamiliar land.

 For others, it may seem grim that I do not seem unequivocally ecstatic to be living in a first world country when my third world origins simply pale in comparison (even by the quality of tap water alone). I hear their curious voices ask if there is anything wrong with my apartment, colleagues, students, or me, because surely, I should acknowledge the absolute good fortune of being one of the chosen ones. But then, do I really need to be that thrilled to appreciate this new world? I think the quiet calm of discovering who I am in the midst of work, travel, and nothing-doing coats my Japanese experience in a fuzzy glow, a foreign feeling, that will linger in my heart long after I leave.

 *This article was submitted for the JET Programme Voices column. Results pending.

Revival of the Fittest

So I’m going to revive this blog by saying that I want to revive my other blog (the one on fashion, which I haven’t updated in years yet coincidentally, gets more hits than this one. Like what). I have been shopping constantly lately (despite the fact that I can't even feed myself three times a day), and although I’m pretty sure I will regret this in the very near future, I want to share my hauls with other cheap queens who would only wear H&M if it was an overrun.

And there’s this, too:

1. Visit all UP campuses
           UP Diliman
           UP Baguio
           UP Los Banos

           UP Cebu
2. Watch an Up Dharma Down gig live
3. Go somewhere far, alone
4. Come up to a stranger I'm attracted to and tell him/her that I find him/her attractive
5. Design (and pay for) my dream bedroom
6. Read Pride and Prejudice in one day
7. Go on a candlelit dinner date
8. Buy my parents new wedding rings
9. Save 100k
10. Find a man who will love all of me
11. Go to a gay bar.

Apparently, straight guys still exist. And most importantly, I can still get one to like me.

Nothing is Too Late

"Hi jaja your existence gives me hope for the human race <3"

Roughly a year ago, I was struggling with depression. Every day, I thought about killing myself. I never would have imagined that someone would ever say these words to me. It goes to show that no matter how useless you feel, there is someone out there who thinks the world is better because you decided to wake up one more time.

Updated Updated Bucket List

1. Visit all UP campuses
           UP Diliman
           UP Baguio
           UP Los Banos
2. Watch an Up Dharma Down gig live
3. Go somewhere far, alone
4. Come up to a stranger I'm attracted to and tell him/her that I find him/her attractive
5. Design (and pay for) my dream bedroom
6. Read Pride and Prejudice in one day
7. Go on a candlelit dinner date
8. Buy my parents new wedding rings
9. Save 100k
10. Find a man who will love all of me
11. Go to a gay bar.

December 2014 Wishlists

December Wishlists a.k.a. Hi Mom and Dad, I love you.

The Idealistic Wishlist:

1. A mini sewing machine
2. A camera
3. A ticket to Japan
4. A ticket to Australia
5. My PhD diploma

The Realistic Wishlist:

1. Three cans of Pringles
2. Two new blazers
3. Adidas sneakers
4. A day of sleep
5. A grade of 3.0 and above for both my PhD subjects this term.

Although on second thought, the last one probably belongs to the first list.

My Awesome List

My best friend Kat challenged me to think of ten things I like about myself and then write them on my blog. If she had asked me to do this five months ago, I would have probably said that the only good about me is that I have the ability to avoid getting hit by a truck despite making strategic attempts to.

Now is a different story. Now, ten is just too easy.

Ten Reasons Why I'm Awesome:

1. I am a pro at job interviews
2. I give great advice
3. I am a fantastic listener
4. You can sit me beside ANYBODY and I'll be best friends with them after five minutes
5. You can trust me with any valuable or any amount of money and I will never get the urge to steal it. This must have something to do with my remote interest in material things
6. I am unbelievably good with children
7. I am a loyal friend
8. I am generous (to a fault, sometimes)
9. I have great legs even though I'm short
10. I'd just have my girl Iggy sing this one for me:

Aww yeah.

The Fourth Saturday: Ongpin

I just realized that I should not have restricted this project to Saturdays because recently, my trips have not exactly been on that certain day. An example would be this particular outing on a Thursday. My mom and I are preparing for my graduation and we wanted to look around for some jewelry. Mama said that they had excellent gold jewelry in Ongpin, loads better than the overpriced junk they sell in malls, so even though I had work that night, I did not sleep, and we headed straight for Manila.

At this point, three things have become clear to me: 1. It was a really short trip; 2. I did not take enough pictures; and 3. That place was freaking awesome.

Manila seems so unexplored to me. Even though it is one of the busiest places I've ever been to, the city contains so many nooks and crannies that I can hardly fathom how people go around oblivious to the wonder all around them. The place is an eclectic mix of the old and the new with its aged, crumbly buildings and newly built highrises, fat tangled cords of electric wire and clomping calesas, Chinese billboards and lofty churches; I wish I had eyes at the back and sides of my head so that I could have taken everything in. I'm pretty sure I looked like a tourist, what with all the oohs and aahs I emitted while we walked the narrow streets of Ongpin. I'm kind of embarrassed to know that despite living in the capital for my entire life, I have gone to Ongpin only three times, and this last one was the longest I've spent there and the time I was most aware of where I was.

We went to two churches and sat through two masses (I felt so holy lol). We bought fruit (that was so affordable and exquisitely ripe), we went to lamp shops to scout for perfect lighting for the new house (50% off! I thought I was going to go insane!), and we went to eat at what I think is the first and most authentic Hap Chan branch in Manila (I need to research this, but judging from how everything tasted, I don't think my assumptions are that far off).

The mango sago wasn't as good as it looked, though

Finally, we window-shopped for jewelry. I was not expecting to find jewelry stores at every street. They lined Ongpin as though the Philippines was a gold mine. From asking around and talking to my mother, I learned a couple of things. The first is that "commercial gold" is fancy sales talk for "fake" or at least "nearly fake." The second is that genuine opal jewelry that had diamonds the size of a nucleus costs 68,000php. I lingered at the store where they had that opal set I so desperately wanted and felt like a kid at Toy Kingdom who constantly pointed at the doll house I was dying to take home. My mother said we were going to go back for it. But I'm pretty sure that if ever we did, I would have to pay for it lol. It's all right, though.. I believe that you have to work hardest for the things you want the most.

The Third Saturday: Zone 5 Photo Studios Inc.

I finished my MA thesis last October and will finally, FINALLY get to attend my second UP graduation in April (I'm old-- don't remind me). Part of the whole pomp and pageantry is getting graduation pictures made. I have been really looking forward to this because my first set was not that...likeable. For my creative shot, my peg was Imelda Marcos. What I got was "Poong Inaalayan" (idk even know how to translate that; yes, it was that bad). So this time, I said I'd prepare even more. I have been conceptualizing even before October and was pretty partial to a Dark Alice theme. There would be time, I said. I can pull this off, I said. We had asked the college about when grad pics would be scheduled, and we were informed that they would start in January. So my friend and co-graduate, Shelley and I stopped bugging the office and just went back on the second week of the said month.

Only to find out that the grad pic schedule was over.

After a brief seizure, we asked/begged around some more and were told we'd be contacted if the people in charge of this year's graduation would have additional schedules. I hung on to the hope that I still had time to prepare since we were told this on a Friday. But since the Universe just loves seeing me have a panic attack, our contact called and said they had a final schedule on the next day, Saturday. This meant that not only did I not have anything prepped, I would also have to go to the studio and have pictures taken right after work, right when my eyebags have taken full control of my face.

Alas, there was nothing to be done, so I met up with Shelley and after some dispute with the GPS on my phone (the taxi driver was pretty vocal about his unbridled hate for it), we got to Zone 5 in Project 8.

The first thing we noticed was the awesome wall artwork that welcomed you as you go up the stairs. I asked Shelley for a quick pose because it was just too edgy!

Pow

Before the photobombers

I would have wanted to take more pictures but people kept accidentally photobombing my shots, so I gave up and headed to the lobby. Since Zone 5 was the assigned studio for UPD, we had special rates and packages. However, you can still have your grad pic taken even without a schedule, something I was very relieved to know. They have walk-in rates (slightly more expensive) and they cater to a number of colleges and universities so you don't have to worry about them not having the right toga. The prices are not that steep, too, considering the quality of shots. We were automatically awed by the creative shots posted on the wall of the lobby and got us pretty pumped for our turn.

Shelley and I were the first ones to get to the studio, so after settling our payments, we didn't have to wait long to have our hair and make-up done. The first shots to be taken were the formal shots, so my stylist just ironed my hair and gave me a nice and simple look. [Warning: selfies ahead]

It didn't take long for me to finish, and after the beautification process, we were led to the photography area. The place is divided into sections because Zone 5 has a variety of sets for creative shots. They take the more formal ones in a smaller area, and apart from the nice photographer, there is an assistant who helps you dress and choose accessories from the studio's own stash. For one of the formal shots, you get to choose the color of the fabric that you wear, and the assistant artfully ties it around you to make an impromptu dress. Another cool thing is that after the serious shots, the photog asks you to pose for a wacky one!

Afterwards, you are asked about what concept you'd like for the creative shot. If you're like us and you have no idea what to do, you can ask them for their catalog of past creative shots. They have a couple of huge albums so you can get a ton of ideas. For my shot, I chose a Audrey Hepburn-esque one, but I wanted to put my own gothic twist to it. This required a change of hair and make-up, so I had to pay extra. I do not regret this, however, because I ended up having the most awesome beehive in history since Marge Simpson.

I can hide my wallet up in there

They also let me borrow accessories and then let me choose my set. I chose a Victorian one, and then waited for my turn.

Sexy paneling

I was not prepared for what happened next. I found out just exactly how hard it was to be a model and look good while doing awkward poses. The photog took so many shots that my entire body hurt after the shoot. It was a one-of-a-kind experience that I wouldn't trade for the world!

After everything's all done, you now go to this little booth where you get to choose the shots you want reproduced. Yes, that fast! They will show you all your unedited shots that very day so that you won't have to wonder how all those poses turned out. Depending on the package you chose, you can get to keep all your photos in a CD and just edit them later to your liking. To be honest, the choosing took longer than the photoshoot. It was so difficult to choose the ones I liked best. I seriously wanted to go with all the wacky ones, but my mother would kill me so I had to go for the ones that made me look halfway decent. After all that was done, Shelley and I went on our merry way to Trinoma to finally get some lunch.

Omnoms

Although we didn't get to go to the UKEAS UK Education Fair as planned, this Saturday was unforgettable because it will be another five to seven years before I get to do this again (yay PhD!). And I'm happy knowing that this time, my grad pics will end up the way I want them to look.

The Second Saturday: Galli Village Cafe and Frosted Desserts

I was going to do something different this weekend but my brother got pneumonia and we had to stay in the hospital to watch over him, so I had to make do with a quick dinner and dessert with my best friend. It turned out to be real fun, though, so no regrets (also, my brother is better, so yay!).

At first, I wanted to go to When Uan Met sally, this artsy shop that also serves some snacks on the side, but when we got there, I figured I would spend so much on the store so since Galli Village Cafe is right beside it, we went in to give it a try.

Chic

Chillin' time

Galli Village Cafe is located at #154 Maginhawa and is small, with a chill, European cafe vibe. It has seats outside for smokers and people who don't want confined spaces. They serve a selection of Spanish cuisine and because my best friend and I were famished, we got Paella Valenciana for 2-3 people and it cost only 295php. We weren't able to eat all of it because the serving was huge. It was also very filling. I got another for take out to have my family try it, too. Next time, I want to try their all day breakfast dishes and probably some wine.

Delicioso!

We decided to go to another place for dessert. I was torn between Bellatini Cafe and Frosted Desserts, but the best friend wanted to go to Bookay Ukay (I SAW MERCEDES CABRAL AGAIN OMG), so we headed to Frosted, at #57 Maginhawa.

Diabetes, here I come

That was also a great decision because we had really sumptious cupcakes and very nice tea (I had peppermint, best friend had lemon ginger).

He was tired of me taking pictures

The cupcake selection isn't too big but it is enough for people who have different tastes: they have premium and classic flavors. I had Jazzy Jane, a vanilla-flavored cupcake that made me want to live in it and eat the frosting forever. Best friend had double chocolate and banana nutella. Yes. Banana Nutella. They also had Smores, Snickers, and Red Velvet. I wanted to try EVERYTHING. But one cupcake is enough to fulfill your craving. If you want to get take out, though, you can (they have really nice packaging, too).

Sugar overload

The cupcakes are not expensive at all. Prices range from 50 to 80 pesos. They also have sundaes, which I can't wait to try on my next visit.

What I found most unique about Frosted is that they also bake cakes for dogs! They also sell pet treats at 120php per pack. I bought beefy gnoshers for my little boy (although he still has to get used to them; his one great love is Dentasticks). Huge plus: they're preservative-free (and that's why you have to refrigerate them).

It expires on Valentine's. Lol.

All in all, it was a nice little Saturday outing. Next week, however, is going to be a bit different because I'm going to a UK Education Fair! And that means one thing: guys with British accents hihihi.

The First Saturday: Taste of Heaven and Bowl & Brew

I'm starting a new project for 2014. Every Saturday, I'm going to try out something new: an experience, a restaurant, a boyfriend (lol no), and will blog about it to document the things I've tried out in the span of a year. This not only helps me remember the wonderful places I've been to and the equally wonderful people I've been with, but will also appear as search results on Google, thus aiding me in my quest to gain more page views. Hue hue hue.

So here's my entry for the first Saturday day of 2014. On this date, I went to two new places in Teacher's Village: A Taste of Heaven and Bowl & Brew.

Appropriately named, I must say

A Taste of Heaven is a milkshake place located at #71 Maginhawa. It's pretty small and seats about 15-20 people at most. Some of my friends have been there and said that their milkshakes were worth a try, and since I was craving milkshakes but didn't feel like being around too many people, I decided to read a book there.

Trying to take a picture of the menu and failing

Their shakes are not that expensive. The classics cost 80PHP while the premium ones cost 130PHP. I tried a mid-priced shake called Peach Banana Cobbler and it was really refreshing and not too sweet. I also ordered TLC (Tenderly Loved Chicken), which came with a side of fries. I don't know what kind of loving went into that chicken but it tasted good.

 Also the guy who made this was pretty cute. 

They also had a "Choose and Shake" menu where you get to choose what to put in your milkshake from a range of chocolates (M&Ms, Reese's, Snickers, etc.). I'm planning to try this one out next time. Yes, there will be a next time because I forgot to slip TLC guy my number.

Bowl & Brew, on the other hand, is another small eatery along Maginhawa. My friend and I chanced upon it when we left Pino because I wanted to walk around after drinking a glass of flavored beer (which you should also definitely try out. Go for Peach). We really didn't plan on going in but the place was too orange to miss.

"Thou shall not resist me," said the sign to us

You could see the snazzy interior from the outside, but being inside was a totally different experience. Everything was so eye-catching that I needed about 50 more eyes to appreciate everything. I mean, there was a bowl galaxy on the ceiling, for crying out loud.

ORRRAAAANGEEEE

Decoration or Time-Space Warp?

When we got there, the staff was having dinner while watching MMK and seemed oddly surprised that two weirdos walked through the door. They quickly gave us a menu and since the sign mentioned "Lucban Specialties," we decided to have a Lucban Longganisa Sandwich. The sign also said "Coffee and More," so we also ordered an Espresso (which the staff called Expresso and turned out to be unavailable so my friend just went for an Americano), and a Latte Machiatto.

Still orange

I have a sweet tooth so I went for the desserts and asked the staff what the cakes on display were called. The one I asked did not know. One of the other girls said "Tiramisu." I pointed to the chocolate cake beside the tiramisu. The girls looked at each other and laughed sheepishly. I joked, "So ano to, something something chocolate something?" [So what's this, something something chocolate something?] And one of the girls said, "Yes, Ma'am." So I didn't order it. Lol.

Our order arrived and although the serving was smaller than expected, the longganisa was pretty good. The bread didn't seem like a good match for it, though, and was a bit hard to chew.

Yep, we just got this. No tissue, no plates, no utensils. I guess coz we didn't order those.

Our coffee also arrived. At least my friend's coffee did. What got served to me was literally just milk with froth on top. My friend pointed it out to the staff and they apologized profusely. They replaced my coffee with something that more closely resembled a latte, but even that fell short. My friend's Americano looked like what you'd get when you poured hot water into a mug with coffee dregs at the bottom. It was sad. It was so sad I couldn't even take a picture of it.

We didn't stay long because apart from the excruciating show on TV, the colors were just too much. We went back out into the night... and was welcomed by a dog on a roof barking at a cat on the pavement. Apparently, our WTF quota had not been reached.

To be fair, I think we caught Bowl & Brew on a bad day. The big boss was not around and when he did come in, he was nice and took our picture to post on their Facebook page (which, unfortunately, I cannot find). I don't know if I'm willing to give this resto another shot, but if someone out there wants to, let me know if you also experience hallucinations right after.

2013 Christmas Wishlist

The last time I did this was several years ago, and all the items on my wishlist were as rare as unicorn blood. I learned from that mistake, so now I compiled a list of things that I can actually get for myself. If you find me attractive/pitiful/convincing (or some other combination of the three), I will not stop you if you want to buy them for me. After all, nothing exemplifies the spirit of giving more than spending your hard-earned money on someone you randomly know on Facebook.

1. Tuxedo Bag from Little Emily Shop

I have been on a hoarding spree on this site lately and I am absolutely in love with everything they sell. I actually wanted the backpack they sold before, but when I checked, it's no longer available. So I want this instead because it's a Tuxedo Bag. Come on.

2. Girly dress from TNC Manila

I am currently revamping my wardrobe to include other colors that actually look like colors rather than shadows. I also feel like I should reiterate the fact that I am a girl once in a while. Hence, this. I don't know how long it's going to stay available because it is a steal for its price (350php) so if no one wants to give to the Jaja Foundation, I may have to steal from my nephew's birthday money to get this.

3. Wallet from anywhere

I don't use wallets like normal people do (i.e. I don't put cash in it and just grad pictures of my college friends), but I've always carried one around. My old wallet is on a semi-permanent hiatus because it has decided to shed its "skin" inside my bag, so this is of a more urgent request rather than me just being materialistic. Although I totally am.

4. A Sketchbook

Even though I have not touched my current one in weeks, I think I'm going to pick up the hobby soon again because holidays = really shitty internet connection. When I first started sketching, I picked the cheapest one because I never thought I would actually draw something remotely resembling a human being, but so far, I have created the likenesses of Gretchen Barretto and Epi Quizon so I might be on to something here.

5. Pencils and Shading Stumps

I heard you needed these to draw on the sketchbook.

6. Boots from Little Emily Shop

No justification required.

7. A Boyfriend

LOL. I'm just kidding. I know you can't give me a boyfriend.

Wait.

You can?

No.

Seriously?

Okay, leave your number in the comments section and I'll get back to you in three years.

Today on the Epic Side of YouTube

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Happy birthday, Ovaries

"Thor has a big magic hammer. And he knows how to swing it."

Thank you for that, Tom. Thank you for that.