Random Review: Expendables 2

Literally got dragged into the cinema. It was free so *shrug*.

• If you're looking for a plot, don't watch this movie.
• If you're looking for well-rounded characters, don't watch this movie.
• If you're looking for guns and guts, watch this movie.
• If you're looking for killing sprees, watch this movie.
• If you're--- okay, you get my point.
• OMG LOOK IT'S CHUCK NORRIS.
• I don't know why, but every time I see Liam Hemsworth, I think of Miley Cyrus' teeth.
• Whenever a lead character in an action movie decides to stop being an action star, he dies. That's just the way life is.
• The dialogue was--- wait, was I about to talk about the dialogue? Sorry, I forgot that there wasn't any. Let's move along.
• It's funny how Dolph Lundgren's intellect was acknowledged in this movie. So I suppose it's now safe to say that yes, I've had a crush on him ever since I could remember. No judging.
• OMG LOOK IT'S CHUCK NORRIS.
• OMG LOOK IT'S CHUCK NORRIS AND THE KING COBRA JOKE.
• Jet Li sounds like his lungs are full of helium.
• Terry Crews, no matter how huge his biceps become, will always be that dude from White Chicks who sang A Thousand Miles. But I got mad respect for this brotha. Mad respect.
• NO SRSLY LOOK IT'S CHUCK NORRIS.
• Let us take this moment to acknowledge the epicness of Chuck Norris.
• While we're at it, let's take this other moment, too.
• And oh, right, Stallone's also in the movie.
• And uh Van Damme. Yeah.
• CHUCK NORRIS!!!!1!!!!1ELEVENTY111!!1!

I Want It That Way

Presenting: My kids.

Bwahahaha. Ha.

The hard part about having a blog

Is when your students decide to google you. Because then they'd know that their teacher is unhinged and most likely unfit to mold the impressionable minds of 16-year-olds.

I'm just glad my Twitter is private.

My Personal Hero

I love this dude. No, seriously.